Allah’s Messenger attached special importance to accepting invitations to wedding feast called walima and said that,
“If anyone of you is invited to a wedding banquet, he must go to it (accept the invitation).” (Bukhari, Nikah, 71)
“If any one of you is invited to a wedding banquet, he should accept (the invitation). If he is fasting, he should pray for the owner of the banquet, and if he is not fasting he should eat.” (Muslim, Nikah, 106)
The Messenger of Allah, who advised accepting invitations to wedding ceremonies, stated that one who refuses an invitation to a banquet without an excuse “disobeys Allah and His Apostle.” (Bukhari, Nikah, 72) Abdullah b. Umar (r. anhuma), who knew the Prophet’s sensibility in this regard, used to accept the invitation whether to a wedding banquet or to any other party, even when he was fasting. (Bukhari, Nikah, 74)
Imams of the four schools of Islamic law all agreed that accepting an invitation to a wedding banquet is obligatory. Other types of invitations are not obligatory like wedding invitations. This is why one should accept the invitations even if he/she is fasting. If it is an obligatory fasting, then he/she does not break it and just prays for the host. The decision of breaking or not a supererogatory fasting is completely up to him/her.
There is some wisdom behind giving so much importance to accepting the invitations to wedding banquets. Weddings are among the happiest times for people and they constitute the best moments for strengthening social relations. In such times people want to see their friends and family beside them. Besides the object of having a banquet is to let people know about the marriage. Announcing the marriage is the most essential part of it. The greater the number of the attendees is the more this object will be achieved.
Not to go to parties without an invitation or not to bring uninvited partners are also considered as among the manners of accepting invitations. In this context, Allah’s Messenger (pbuh) said that, “He who enters without an invitation enters as a thief and goes out as a raider.” (Abu Dawud, At’imah, 1) If one has to take someone that originally was not invited to an event with him, then he/she should first ask the host for permission. The following incident is an exemplary one in this matter:
An Ansari man, called Abu Shu’aib, visited the Messenger of Allah (pbuh). When he saw that the Prophet’s face was pale, he figured that he had not eaten anything for some time. Shu’aib (r.a.) came and told his butcher son,
“Prepare meals sufficient for five persons, for I want to invite the Prophet along with four other persons as I saw signs of hunger on his face.” Abu Shu’aib invited them and another person came along with them. The Prophet said to Abu Shu’aib,
“This man followed us, so if you allow him, he will join us, and if you want him to return, he will go back.” Abu Shu’aib said, “No, I have allowed him.” (Bukhari, Buyu’, 21)
In the tradition expressed above, the Prophet’s (pbuh) explanation to the host is an example which shows what one can do in such a situation with invited guests but also with uninvited ones. This tradition also shows us how the host and the invited guests should deal with such situations.